Amarkmayican Idol: Who will take over for Trev? That and more with College Gameday Recap

Recapping the predictive abilities of morons talking about football. 20/20 goggles on and ready to go.

Corso:
Hints that Ohio State might lose because the game will end at night. "I say nothing!!!" Old coot.
One loss team with biggest concerns: Oklahoma
Miami can "win 'em all" if they have a snapper and a holder; compares them to 1983 team tha lost opener and won them all. "I say nothing!!!" Weirdo.
TCU could be Utah of 2005
Would start Zwick. "I would not change quarterbacks for quarterback change [unintelligible] trails off... Odd.
Blames QB rotation for Georgia losses. Fowler says Corso's still mad about that. Doesn't he realize that it wasn't the QB rotation, but rather the curse that him wearing the mascot head that caused UGA to lose? Accountability, Lee. Take it.
Iowa is elite, and overrated. We'll find out how good when they play "our" buckeyes.
Michigan hasn't played defense since 1997
Richt, Fulmer and Tuberville are classy.
Shockley is for real. Georgia's D wins for them. UGA wins big.
Admits he was wrong about ND. Calls Pitt "mighty" three times! They're just killing May today (see below).
Vince Young is your game changer.
NSFMotherfucker (even though Kirk hadn't said anything yet): Maryland wins over Clemson.
Picks Iowa close (half credit?)
NSFMF: (again, before Kirk had said anything) Nebraska beats Wake (and why are they talking about that?)
Plays to the crowd on ND-Mich pick.

Herbstreit:
Secretaries in the UT athletic department are infected by Vince Young's confidence.
Oklahoma: needs a passing game, defense had no emotion, heart, desire; no leadership. Bigger concerns than Auburn, Miami, others.
Likes GT.
Zwick should start, Smith should get in early. Herbstreit talks out of both sides of his mouth in saying the opposite, but then agreeing with May. "I just said that" (he said something completely different).
Iowa is elite. Was with marginal athletes, now even better.
Georgia wins close.
Rubs in Pitt sucking to May.
Notre Dame within 2-3 years is back to a power in college football. ABOUT TO BUILD A DYNASTY ("mark it down", he says, and so I do).
Ohio State D is one of the most athletic and agressive in college football.
Chizik is one of the best D coordinators in college football (he broke out the superlative twice in a minute after not saying a thing all day).
Brady Quinn is your game changer.
Admits he was wrong about Clemson - last week's dumbest statement. Good on ye.
Says he'll pick against Washington no matter what, cause they suck.
Upset special - Wake over Nebraska.
Plays to the crowd on ND-Mich pick.
Brings out his kids to make his OSU pick. His kids look like the twins who played Frankenstein in Big Daddy and Ross's kid on Friends.

Fowler:
OSU-UT won't define the season (really? 'cuz it sure seems like the hype suggests that).
OSU-UT isn't armageddon, just fun. (WTF? Dude, it's a big game. Just call it that.)
Nick LaChey is "our resident rock star". Rock star. Yeah. He said it. Dumbest statement of the day.
Iowa might be overrated, not as good as Herbstreit thinks. Trap game for Iowa.
Incidental hilarity or intentional?: when talking to Mark May, Fowler (with a huge shit eating grin) worked in the phrase "take it on the chin". Clearly referring to Mark's facepussy (which I will hear no argument against the fact he grew it to distinguish him from Carlton of the Fresh Prince)
What's that shit about Michigan's AD telling the students to sit down? What a fucking moron.
Chad Greenway is your game changer (whiff).
Says Kirk's kid's heartbeat is pounding while sitting on Fowler's lap. I'm a little creeped out by this scene.

May:
Zwick should start for OSU and shouldn't get a quick hook.
Notre Dame isn't that good because Pitt sucks.

Holtz (vomiting in my mouth):
Maryland lost last year to the "University of Clemson" - intentional? I'd say so, even though normally I'd chalk it up to the oatmeal between his ears.

Howard:
Very loud boos. I like it.
Mouthpieces slow you down. Never heard that before. Interesting, sort of.
Troy Smith should start for OSU.
Agrees with Herbstreit about ND becoming a dynasty.

Lachey:
More boos. Kind of surprising. Probably because he's fair weather.
I honestly think his Hail to the Victors piece was absolutely tongue in cheek.
Howard and Lachey singing Hail to the Victors in the Shoe - probably will cause death threats.


Miscellaneous:
even the Lovely Wife thinks the Bubba Sparxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx song was better. If you've lost Cronkite... And the actual lyrics are "Yeah, this song is... purdy Shit-tay".
The Gillette "Game Face" bit is equally hilarious and tragic. Freaking terrible.
First I've seen the Takeshi "This is Sportscenter" commercial. How does Anderson keep a straight face?
I'm not sure what Gameday thing makes me laugh/pisses me off the most. Options: Game Face, Big&Rich, the bullshit walkthrough bit on the turf (which they thankfully didn't do this week). Maybe one thing that always cracks me up is the footage of the team breakfast. Always comedy. Is there any reason for a camera there? Vince Young uses ketchup on his eggs - a clear advantage for Ohio State! Oh look, Mack Brown burned his toast! He clearly doesn't have his mind in the right place!
And is that Audi commercial where the car drives up a ski jump for real? For skreel?

Selections:

Corso: 18-5, 35-10 on the year
Herbstreit: 19-4, 37-8 on the year.

Recap thoughts:
Holtz is a terrible choice to replace Trev.
The pundits really went overboard in catering to OSU, as they have for the last few weeks.
Cutting the walkthrough segment is a good move.
Only two NSFs, and both of them were premature ejaculations. Nice, now go back to your pudding.
Howard improved a bit this week, but he's still pretty weak.