Monday, June 27, 2005

NBA Draft tomorrow

First, go look at this. Drew Gooden rules.

Here's what I think will happen: Bogut to Bucks, Marvin to Hawks, blah blah blah. Don't really care for a while after that. Hawks blow their second pick and I guaranfuckingtee you that there will be more than 2 future All-Stars taken in the second round. Too many young players in the pool who have potential.

Here's what I would do were I the smartest guy on earth, Billy Knight: Draft Marvin, trade him for the best offer you can get that offers the chance at a top PG and a big man. If that means Charlotte (if D. Williams or Paul drop to 5, especially), great. If it means taking Channing Frye (who I think might be a better pick than Bogut for teams looking for a big man), great. I also like Joey Graham.

Ideal scenario for Hawks: Paul with 5, Graham or Hakim Warrick with the 13, Randolph Morris with the early second rounder, Louis Williams with the late second rounder.

Likely scenario for Hawks: Marvin Williams with 2, that midget PG from Washington (who I think sucks) with the early second rounder, some terrible European who will never sign with the late second rounder.



Simple Braves Post

Since I stopped posting, the Braves are 8-2 and Andruw has been kicking ass. So I don't want to ruin everything, but I had to say something.

Saturday, after Reitsma blew the lead, Andruw jacked one to win the game. Naturally, the dugout emptied to celebrate and welcome Jones at the plate. First dude out of the dugout, jumping around like a nine year old on a pogo stick? Tim Hudson. Dude. Get healthy. Ain't like we haven't been lucky as hell to eke by these last couple weeks.

Apparently Hudson had a good day throwing today. But, man. I was kind of pissed to see him running out like that.

Conspiracy theorists - how many days has he been out? 15?


Flick the button

Batman Begins: I tried to avoid other reviews of this because I actually wanted to see it, so I might duplicate other's opinions. I really liked it. Very surprised how they were able to get so many impressive actors to take bit or supporting roles. As with every comic movie, what I like to watch for is the way they've created a world within the framework of what is already known - using creativity to turn around what I already expected. Everything about this worked for me. It was realistic and fantastic. Clever, but not by too much. Well acted, and Bale made himself a star. One thing I thought worth mentioning was how the film invokes 9/11 (isolated island, fear tears people apart), but I didn't feel it hit me over the head with sentimentality or pull heartstrings. I think it was better than the other Batmans, and I'm having trouble thinking of a better movie of this kind (I really liked the first Spiderman, but this tops it). Cadillac.



Time to return to bringing my Levi Garrett fueled acidity back to the internet.

Why gone? Framed by Willie Green, who took over the coke game. Luckily I got Queen Bee on my side to convince the Warden in her own special way.

But now back to business, which is fucking up motherfuckers, naturally.


Thursday, June 16, 2005

An off season soccer post

Lee Bowyer is a freaking idiot. To the uninducted, he's a decent midfielder for Newcastle United, but he tends to get into a little trouble. There was a little bit of a racially motivated attack on a student back in 1998 when he played for Leeds. He also refused to accept the punishment he was given for the same incident. Then he cleated a player for Malaga in the head in a Uefa Cup tie, which earned him a 6 match European ban (that was extended because Newcastle is run by morons apparently). Most recently, with Newcastle having slim chances for a European slot, Bowyer and teammate Kieron Dyer get into a fight with each other (check the picture) during a game. Both sent off, crazy publicity.

So Newcastle's finally had enough of him, and they're letting him go for quite a bit less than he's probably worth. Birmingham City are willing to take him on to improve their mediocre lineup.


The fans don't like the idea (even though they know he'd make the team better). The team president actually pleads with the fans to accept Bowyer with open arms, so he'll want to come on the cheap. The fans don't budge, talking about things like, oh, dignity and integrity. The team, not so much. The club president then says it's the fans who are being irrational. [In fairness, it was a small group of fans who protested originally, but I think they're dead right.]

Finally, it's Bowyer who says he probably won't come to Birmingham City. Because it is right and just that he should be the one to decide. And it'd be, like, gay and stuff to say something like, "I understand what the supporters are worried about, since I've made so many bad decisions, but I've learned from my mistakes and I can't wait to prove to these fans that I've changed and I can't wait to improve this club."

Any team that spends a dime on him deserves what they get. A lunatic that ruins chemistry.

Even Ron Artest isn't a comparable athlete. Wrap up Spree, Artest, and Jose Guillen together, and maybe you're close.


Doctor, Wyatt hurt when I pee?

The Wyatt Sexton story is hilarious to me. But how dumb does FSU think we all are? Sexton goes to a Dave Matthews concert (OK, maybe he does have mental problems) and then goes apeshit on some cops, but drugs aren't the problem... Right.

The question then is...

Is it that he's white, or is it that he's a coach's son? "It" of course is that the story is "His health is the more important thing..." rather than "FSU athletes out of control".

I'm going with coach's son for now, but I reserve the right to add whiteness later.


For Cocaine Bref

Over the last couple o' days I've heard Sam Prekop several times on XM. Sounds pretty good. Wish I'd seen him live, where I'm sure he's even better. Also, one of his songs was followed by Masters of the Hemisphere (Local Gov't or something like that?).

Channel was XMU. Do bands get paid for song plays on XM?


What, meme worry?

I've answered these things before, but I've never been tagged before. Weird. Kinda feel like an unwashed new ex-virgin. In any event, thanks Hillary. Although I think there are like two people who read this, and you're one... so I'm not sure who gets this next...

Here we go:

Total books I own:

Including text books and law bullshit, probably around 175 or so. I've left behind a bunch in different moves, so it was probably around 400-500

Five Books that had a big influence on me:

1. Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra - No book punctures the heart of the dreamer, the rueful man, the lover, the man as much. And it is the funniest book ever written. The only thousand page book I could read over and over again.

2. The Simon and Schuster Young Readers' Atlas - Memorized the fuck out of this back in the day. This and the world map shower curtain form the basis of like half the shit I remember from ages 8-14. I've gotten drunk for free (trivia, not "Buy me a drink because I know the capital of Belize") many a time thanks to this book, which is good enough to make the list.

3. Sartor Resartus, or The Tailor Retailored by Thomas Carlyle - Personal choice here. The furthest I'll go is to say no book has changed my point of view of the world more than this.

4. Tie: The Dog Star by Donald Windham and Brighton Rock by Graham Greene - Two books of angst-ridden youth. I probably like the writing in The Dog Star better, it's set in ATL, and the author is a Georgian. Brighton Rock it so tight, though. And for a while I've thought about writing a screenplay based on it, but set at Coney Island, with Hot 97 as the radio station that does the promotions, and DMX in the role of Pinky. Both these books should be required reading for 18 year old boys/men.

5. Tie: The Great Brain by John D. Fitzgerald and A Harvard Education in a Book by the Editors of the Harvard Lampoon - Sense of humor means something, right? The Great Brain series gave me the scheming, the Harvard book gave me the snark.

I'd like to mention something newer that would've made the list had I more room (and yes, I know I cheated) - Read We Wish To Inform You That Tomorrow We Will Be Killed With Our Families: Stories From Rwanda by Phillip Gourevitch. An important, harrowing and oddly uplifting read.

Last Book I Bought:

It was Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer, but it was a gift for mi madre. For myself I think it was Bobby Fischer Goes To War: How The Soviets Lost the Most Extraordinary Chess Match of all Time, and it was a while ago when I bought it (I seem to buy enough for a stack, and then work my way through them). So long I can't really remember why I got it. But now that I think about it, I kind of want to read it.

Last Book I Read for the First Time:

I'll probably finish See No Evil by Robert Baer tonight, but technically it's Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris. Hit and miss funny. The chapter on his brother "The Rooster" made me shit my pants though.

Five Bloggers to tag: Heh. Nobody reads this drivel, especially when I only post once a fortnight.

Commenters, both, are free to post something.


Sunday, June 12, 2005

No excuses and no exceptions

This summer the Wrangler is interning with the Attorney General's office in Guyana. Just before he left he got a new car (as the result of a near death experience). His car came with 3 months of XM radio, which I have been able to enjoy. XM is pretty much awesome. I haven't been able to check out every station, because I get hooked on one and leave it for a while. UPop is probably the station I listen to most, but I also spend a lot of time on "Fred" the 80's alternative station.

But the main reason why XM rules: Friday morning, on the way to work.

In the Closet, volumes 1 through 5. In succession. No better way to start the day.

Much thanks to you, Mr. Wrangler.


Sports blow this time of year (and even worse when the Braves eat a dick)

Aside from all the bad news that just seems to pile up about Georgia Football (nothing new but that doesn't stop the AJC from devoting plenty of space to supposed problems), I can't find much to write about.

Well, Thursday the US Open starts. I'm no golf fan, but I appreciate the democratic way the Open determines the field. And this year congratulations to Franklin Langham and Ryuji Imada, former Bulldog golfers, who have qualified.

Imada was a springtime Red and Black fixture when I was in college, so it's good to see he's having some success. However, how crazy is the money structure in pro golf where Imada (or is it Ryuji?) has made $333,598 this year so far, but he's only 108th on the money list? That's an asston of money for someone who can't even be assured of keeping his tour card for next year. Actually, now that I think about it, that's pretty close to the league minimum for baseball and football. So maybe that isn't all that much. But also, I'd guess he needs to keep winning to stay on tour. Is money in pro golf bigger than the NFL or MLB? I never would've guessed so. Maybe I'm an idiot.

So this weekend look for old white dudes bitching about the rough and slick greens, in between cholestoral pill and mutual fund commercials.


Random or is it...

1. Blaine Boyer, member of the Wrangler's graduating class, gets the call up to the Braves. He becomes I believe the second Walton Raider to make the big leagues (Mark Pisciotta had a cup of coffee with the Cubs a while back). Bully for Blaine. First pro athlete who has been in my parents' house.

2. Speaking of how awesome Walton is, I saw an episode of Room Raiders the other morning. Douchebag gelhead goes through bedrooms, blah blah blah, vibrators, panties, dusty cabinets, etc. Anyway, the girl he picks (to win? a date with him?) is named Lauren and has a huge Walton Raider megaphone. Hell yes. Nobody got shit on fine ass Raider fillies. I pretty sure someone in my family knows this girl. Short brown hair. Neighborhood looked like Waterford Green. Not the Lauren we know well.

3. In fact, the MTV family of networks pretty much was LD central yesterday morning. First, WHS victory on Room Raiders. Then, I flipped to one of the other MTV channels (Hits or Jams, or something that actually shows videos) and four videos in a row have something in common with my daily life. First was Ciara's "Oh", which shows my office building in the background. Next, Chingy's "One Call Away", which also shows the office building. Then Fat Joe (featuring Nelly) brought "Get it Poppin'" which has him driving along the connector. ATL, bitches. And finally, (I think on Jamz, if I was watching the other channel) Youngbloodz "Damn!" which was filmed partly in the parking lot of Abdullah the Butcher's House of Ribs and Chinese Food (apparently they have excellent fried rice and rib tips), but also has a segment filmed in Decatur. Hard core as an eyesore, motherfucks.

4. Today's AJC (printed in the opinion section, can't find it online) also has a story about how Georgia has become crazy central. The banishment movement is catching on! Join the fun!


Flick the Button

1. William Shakespeare's Romeo + Juliet: Yet another movie I thought I saw long ago, but now I think I started watching, got a headache from the editing and camera jiggling and turned it off. Stylistically bold, but also could use a whole lot of refinement. Some, no, probably most, of the actors and actresses are just a little bit short of having the credibility to pull off the respective roles. If this were a much bigger hit, I fear that there would've been a dozen lookalikes - 11 of which would suck royally, but one which would probably be incredible. Bonus points because Benvolio played the dude with the hilariously terrible wig in Hu$tle. Fired.

2. The Ladykillers: Original, Ealing Studios version. I haven't seen the Coen Bros. version. Here's the thing with this movie: while I thought it was funny, the old lady annoyed me so much that I was really rooting for them to murder her. Guinness is unrecognizable, and hilarious. The heist seems just too simple too. Of course, I like heist movies - and I don't know whether this really is one. Might be just because it wasn't what I was expecting, but fired.

3: Kind Hearts and Coronets: Fantastic. Funny, well acted, well staged, ingeniously written. One of the best comedies before 1975, but it's not madcap (and probably why I like it more than most early comedies). Clever, but doesn't browbeat you with it's cleverness. A gentlemanly comedy. Cadillac.

4: The Magnificent Seven: Not as good as Samurai, but tough and manly and cool and clever. I wasn't drawn in as much as some of the other westerns, but it's still really good. Even with all the badass machismo, Coburn stands out. Throughout the movie I was trying to place the actor who plays Lee. Of course, that'd be Pootie Tang. My brain works in mysterious ways. Steak knives.

5: Duck Soup: I'm not much of a fan of Marx Brothers films and I have trouble saying why. I think they age poorly, and maybe because so many comics have ripped them off, the original jokes seem stale. And I know that isn't a good reason, but it's my experience. All that said, this is much better than the others I've seen. It's shorter for one thing, and doesn't rely on annoyance humor as much. Plus, Groucho doesn't really have to play a romantic character, which he can't pull off. It's funny. Made me laugh a lot. Cadillac.


Monday, June 06, 2005

Flick the Button

1. Emma: Not bad, but not as good as Clueless (seriously gay that I just wrote that). Paltrow is better here than in, well anything else I've seen her in (not saying too much...). Northam was probably miscast. He was too old (and I still think he's weird looking with that enormous gourd). I wanted to like it a little more than I did. Several scenes seemed way too staged, forced, unnatural. I'll be stingy. You're fired.

2. Welcome to the Dollhouse: Another movie I thought I saw a long time ago, but after watching it I didn't remember anything about 20 minutes in. Anyway, I'm not sure of what to do with this. I laughed my ass off at a few scenes, but then again, other scenes just didn't work at all. And those that didn't work outnumbered the ones that did by about 8-1. The acting was fine. The score was not in line with the rest of the film. The acting was very good. The wardrobe was spectacular. Not fired up enough by this though. You're fired.

3. The Hustler: Here's a movie with a score that works. The opening scene is fantastic. Long lull in the middle. Piper Laurie is a great wet blanket. It seemed like forever until things picked up again. I liked the scenes in Louisville, but the final scene was kind of a letdown. The first match with Fats is so great, that the second just couldn't keep up. Anyway, all the actors are great, but the lull in the middle and the final scene just make this a set of steak knives.

4. The Great Dictator: Well, it's kind of a mess, unfortunately. It's way too long, and the mixed identity plot doesn't work all that well. There are a few laughs, and the closing speech is pretty inspiring. It's well shot too. However, Chaplin's earlier works are a little more memorable, and there wasn't a boxing scene. That's unforgivable. Steak Knife.


Bulldog Update

A few random things...

1) Hoop Dawgs get back some scholarships. Great news, now let's use them. Ive got faith in Felton. This can only speed up the rebuilding. I'm on record to say that we'll make the tournament within 3 years (was it 2? I think it was 3 seasons...). I say we with 12-14 next year, 15-18 the next year, 18-21 the next. Now if we can use that extra one for Louis, I might revise that last sentence.

2) Anyone want to play Linebacker? Starting to get worried. That position is too key to our D.

3) I like the Colorado games on the schedule. Even though they're a little down right now, that's a program with enough recognition that they'll be back strong, probably when we play them. It wouldn't surprise me if they suck this year, Barnett gets canned, and a very good coach takes over and returns the program to elite status.

4) This Q & A with Michael Adams gets to why I'm kind of uncomfortable with him, and why I know tons of Dawg fans loathe him. He talks like a politician all the time, and even politicians don't talk like that about sports. Seriously, you'd see senators making bets and shit. But Adams never turns off the serious bullshit "we need to do what's right" sanctimony and fake PR fronting. At some point, we all want to hear the man say "I want to beat Florida and I couldn't give two shits if the guys who do it can read or not." Even if he can't say that, he can say something that doesn't look like it was drafted by the lawyers. Anyway, I ain't an Adams hater like a lot of folks, but I wish he'd lighten up a little. He can be serious about research.